When Arsene Wenger substituted Alex Oxlade-Chamberlain for Andrei Arshavin in the 74th minute of Arsenal's match against Manchester United on Sunday, captain Robin van Persie's negative reaction to the switch was caught by TV cameras. Though his reaction was proven well-founded in some respects since Arshavin was at fault on Man United's late winner, it still wasn't the kind of thing Arshavin would've enjoyed had he seen it. The following is a transcript of Arshavin's confrontation with Van Persie at training the next day.
Arshavin: Hello, Robin. I saw your reaction yesterday on the television.
RVP: You did? I mean, what reaction.
Arshavin: The one like I used to do when Nicklas Bendtner would come into match.
RVP: Heh. Yeah, no. That wasn't about you at all Andrei. I was just upset that Alex was coming off...for you.
Arshavin: OK.
RVP: You're not angry?
Arshavin: No.
RVP: Well, that's good. But that's also a bit bad. Andrei, it really seems like you just aren't motivated anymore.
Arshavin: That's what she said. [laughs]
RVP: She who?
Arshavin: A woman who cannot drive.
RVP: What? You're not making sense, Andrei. Look, you need to be motivated with your football.
Arshavin: You are captain of team, big man. You must motivate me.
RVP: Fine. Just...how do I put this? Don't take this the wrong way, but you've turned into an older, smaller Bendtner. It's that bad.
Arshavin: That bad? OK. You motivate me. You also make me feel like colon symbol followed by 17 left brackets.
RVP: What?
Arshavin: :(((((((((((((((((
RVP: Oh. I'm sorry, Andrei. I really am. But we need you back at your best.
Arshavin: You know why Bendtner is no good?
RVP: ...no. Why?
Arshavin: Because he is Bendtner.
[10 minutes later]
RVP: Are you done?
Arshavin: Yes.
Video via Surreal Football